KRENG’S FIRST DREAM.
Scnejder had slept like a lamb so you know where this is leading us.
Scnejder awake was puzzled why he had been caring so much for something that evidently did not exist, had never existed; or why he cared when it no longer existed after it had never existed & would not exist. It certainly must have had an existence in his mind but was that enough? Was that all? Surely it had to have happened, to have been revealed, outside in the world as well for it to be cared for. Asleep or awake face it.
Kreng too had had a dream. Her first. It had left a dark, indecipherable feeling for a moment as she awoke. And some things did look different. Her wings had gone. So she decided to find out just what that feeling was made of & why it had come into existence.
And as soon as he saw her Scnejder knew he was in Hell. He didn’t know who Kreng was. Didn’t know her name. Didn’t know why she had a troubled look.
- You took your time - Kreng scowled the rebuke.
Who is this woman, Scnejder wondered. Did they know each other this well? He didn’t know where she thought he was coming from or going to. He hesitated & faltered his reply.
- Wouldn’t you?
- It’s only a thin line. Thin as paper. I would have been straight across.
- Couldn’t wait? Is it so urgent?- He didn’t know why he asked.
- Sounds more like this your world. Not mine.
(Yes. It was another scowl not another seductive glance).
- Which world? This one is an aberration.
Scnejder stopped. Had he spilled those thoughts out aloud? And had they brought this creature into existence?
- It doesn’t matter whether the feelings were possible or impossible they could only exist in your mind & never anywhere else. There was no place for them to be fleshed out. Look at it. Kreng drew him close & took out a cellophane sheet on which was the diagram of a woman’s body that sparkled in innumerable places – This is how you have to see her now. It’s as clear as daylight.
- What is?
Scnejder sniffed. The sparks dwindled & were extinguished. A grey mass of cloud obscured the flat landscape. The lakes sparkled. Their water was sliced into innumerable licks. Soon after they parted Scnejder questioned whether they had ever met unable to fix a unique contour or feature. It always troubled him that the switches in his life were so abrupt they obliterated every previous step.
Snowflakes formed the labyrinth. In certain lights Scnejder was visible. Only a few. When the sun gave everything a shadow. Mostly he was invisible. Mostly he was grey. They both stared at the photo of him or rather his shadow as if trying to remember if they had ever known the person disguised in black & white. And not quite sure. It doesn’t snow like that anymore.
- One mind never touches another? (Barely quizzical more affirming the usual). Is that the difference between us?
- Look at it. Each mind is enclosed by itself in this blancmange. Kreng tapped the skull.
- Then how did a few ordinary seconds change so many things? And so many times.
- They were so commonplace they were beyond being described as ordinary. They happen to many people. Everybody probably.
- So that time it can count? How’s that? Scnejder liked things in a mess. If there was nothing to untangle he didn’t know where to start. If something was inexact so much the better; it could be given a line. Because we want it to is enough. Kreng made a gesture linking the tips of her breasts together with her thumb & little finger.
As the train pulled in a vertical lightning strike divided the sky with a saw edge line.
All three saw it. Kreng & Orange Horse. And Scnejder.
This train coming from the east out of a revelation did not bring back the happy dead. Black, white & red painted wooden cars splintered by age shunted into the buffers. A door swung out. Someone muttered.
- Saw a round dance – no good came of it.
Kreng studied the shapes of the passengers intently & then Orange Horse. She realized Orange Horse was not a man.
Scnejder was now interested. An owl hooted in the shadows.
- Better it didn’t have an edge, an end or sides.
Kreng fidgeted at this description that bordered on accuracy. She recalled something about a glove but refused to allow it in at the moment. It would be useful later. Kreng returned her gaze to Orange Horse who was pushing up an umbrella & then beckoned Kreng to join her under it. She whispered in Kreng’s ear – I don’t want to be like a six-sided box & collapse under a man.
This, of course, is what an entirely different sequence of words sounded like to Kreng who felt she must try being these things to help Orange Horse.
- Hollow, she mused, and without these cardboard walls quite comfortable. Rook flapped about outside wondering where the Hell the rest of Kreng had gone. And why a very large man had materialized. Don’t worry Kreng whispered to Orange Horse who had actually taken a step forward, I need him to sit so I can find out what you fear. She smiled & Rook felt a tremor that could have been hook shaped. Rook cocked his head on one side. Orange Horse went right up to the man very close. And whispered - the birds are still pecking at me as I lie & think of your visit. Same as before Kreng had heard different words.
Rook’s claws tickled the box accidentally & Kreng felt a little uncomfortable with the pleasurable sensation the waves had given her. But she was pleased she could make do without the Rook component. It was very useful out there.
Orange Horse groaned. The man had taken her into his arms. Together they appeared like a monster Scnejder said later. How could they be so close & not meld.
Rook, startled, began a caw.
- Hush, said Kreng I don’t want to miss any of these groans.